Thursday 28 May 2015

My foul shot

My foul shot

In writing this week we have been looking at the poem foul shot. We had to make our own won we had to use capital letters on each line, record each action on each line, no unnecessary words and use strong action words. 


Girl and pony are five strides away
Jump set at a 1.15m is in there way of winning
She urges her pony on
Saying “You can do it just one jump”
Then with one final kick
The pony gathers her hindquarters
Pushes,
Stretches,
Jumps
The girl throws herself forward
Slides her hands up her pony’s neck


                            
                           
            
Her pony's hindquarters clip the pole
The girl holds her breath
The pole
Wobbles,
Wiggles,
Quivers,
Plays it coy


And then
                    And then
                                        And then


Just before falling
The pole stays put
The girl gives the pony a big sweaty pat.
They did it.


 

quick write


Quick Write
IALT: create a quick write that includes description through the use of complex sentences.
IALT: place a comma in the correct place when writing a complex sentence.
IALT: identify different types of complex sentences - Opener, serial and interupter.

IALT: use strong short sentences.
ManuelToribio-THE%20FLIGHT[1].jpg









For writing this week we had to look at the picture above and write a descriptive piece of writing about why he's doing it and weather it's a sad or happy day and in the first paragraph we had to try set the scene it had to include complex sentences and short powerful. here is mine.


The feel of freedom


As I step on to the old wooden jetty,  my heart pounds. I slip off my shoes. I can hear the splish splosh of the waves against the beach down below me. I look over to see tall buildings, yachts and seagulls staring hopelessly at me. I think to myself, “What am I doing? This could be dangerous.”


I clamber onto the rustic barrier. Adrenaline rushing through my body. I reach the top. I brace myself, bend my knees, push, stretch. I feel the freedom,my arms trail behind me. Then I say to myself “I am going to be free before the sea meets me”. Suddenly my hands reach the water , and at the speed of lightning I’m in the water.


When I finally come up I’m gasping for breath, I had done it.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 

This week we ha to look after an egg thankfully he survived the whole week here is my egg diary my egg is called sir eggsalot.

TUESDAY- Today Sir Eggsalot arrived YAY!. He was a good boy for the day but when we got home he would not go to sleep.

1432071301452.1.jpgHere is a picture of him not going to sleep

He was so naughty that he had to go in the naughty corner|
1432071349161.8.jpg Him in the naughty corner
WEDNESDAY
Today I was carrying sir eggsalot and i dropped him lucky it was on the beanbag. Today Bella.B’s egg died, sorry I don’t have any pictures
THURSDAY
Today sir eggsalot’s friend died his name was eggtato, sir eggsalot was very sad
sorry I don’t have any pictures
FRIDAY
Today was sir eggsalot’s last day he had survived the whole week YAY I hope he never dies
sorry I don’t have any pictures

Monday 11 May 2015

writing to the unknown soldier

For our inquiry on ANZAC day we had to do a piece of writing to the unknown soldier. To write it I had to use my knowledge of ANZAC day and the experience the soldiers had at war, and we had to use paragraphs,complex sentences and short powerful sentences.

To the soldier who never returned

I have not experienced war. I am writing to you in my safe classroom to tell you that we still remember you as a brave soldier who defended our country and lost your life.

How did you feel when you put your uniform on for the first time? We have heard that some of you were forced to go to war, and others signed up thinking that you were going on an adventure not knowing that you might never return home. That you might die in your hot sweaty uniform.

I can not imagine what it would be like living with the rats. Did anyone get the black plague?I can’t imagine waking up and finding ten dead rats on top of you. I have heard that almost all the fruit was  rotten. Did you miss your mum’s warm food, and the four meals you had at home everyday. I bet you did.

How did it feel walking through the masses of dead bodies?  Was it  gross, frightening. I know one thing it would be bad. Did any of your friends die?

How did you feel when you were given a gun and told to go and kill people? What did you feel like frightened,worried, or did you just want to go home? I know I would.

I heard that parents went away to war, and to their kids disappointment came back as empty souls.`

Thanks again for defending our country
Yours sincerely Bella.L